Thursday 10 October 2013

One Step Forward

Before I start, I think I should warn you that this blog is not my happiest, and although it's highly relatable and entertaining to read these sorts of things, just know you were warned about it.

Okay, so as some of you know, I recently started learning to drive. Now, I got a lot of slack for doing it so late. In fairness, when I turned sixteen, I committed all my time and effort into school. On top of that, I honestly didn't see the big deal. I knew I'd get my licence eventually, and I had no reason to rush the process. Buses and trains got me everywhere I needed to be, and I never felt pressured into getting my licence quickly because of it. I've come to the conclusion that even if I really wanted to get my licence then, I wouldn't have had the time. I was far too busy with school, and I wasn't earning enough to pay for lessons. So that's how I got to being on my L's at 18. 

So I've done my compulsory 10 instructor hours, and I'm at that frustrating stage where everyone I know with an open licence either refuses to supervise me, or they're too busy. That's totally understandable; everyone has their own life and priorities. But this feeling always seems to happen when you want something the most. Being in Uni and having all these extra responsibilities really puts the pressure on to hurry it up, too. Especially when half your friends are already on their P's. The joy.

Once I'd hit the 10-hour mark, I was feeling great about driving. I couldn't wait to get my hours up. Then life hit me in the face with a reality check: this will probably take longer than I was hoping. And this happens in so many situations. This is my most recent experience -- last week to be precise -- so I'm using it. But we can all relate. 

You  get off to a flying start on a new project/goal, and for the first few weeks, everything seems to be going great. Then you're woken by the reality check that it's not going to be a smooth ride all of the way. I really struggled with this in terms of my driving situation, because even without disruptions, it takes a good several months to acquire the 100 hours your dreaded logbook demands. And quite frankly, I just want to get it over with. So I got to that point where my high quickly plummeted to a low, and doubts started setting in. If you've been in a similar situation, you'll understand what I mean when I say I went one step forward and two steps back. You feel great for a while, then something comes along and puts a halt in your progress right when you need things to work. You know the moment. It's like that party trick you've been practicing forever, but the moment you try to show someone, you screw up.

Anyway, what I learned through the whole experience was two things: 1. Patience, and 2. Perseverance. Allow me to explain.

I think we struggle more with our perception of situations than the actual situation. For example, two people looking at the same artwork draw different meaning from it, the way two people in a dangerous situation might handle it differently. Life is so much about perception. In my situation, I looked at the negative side of the problem first. I went straight to thinking about how many hours I still have to go before I'm anywhere near getting my licence. 

Looking back on it now, though, I realised it's more important that I've made a start, that I'm doing all I can to seek supervision, and there's nothing more I can do than that. When you accept that you've done all you can do, the best thing left is patience. It's like being stuck in traffic jam. You've come this far, and you know you'll get out of it eventually; but you also know it's going to take longer than you expected to get to where you're going. Of course it's frustrating -- you just want to get to your destination. But there's clearly nothing you can do but wait. I think that's a good way to look at these situations. Although you might be frustrated in the moment, you need to remember that it will pass, and in the right timing, you'll be back on your way. So that's the patience part.

Persistence is just as hard as patience in these situations. When you're trying to do something, and things keep coming in the way of that, you start to wonder if it's even worth it anymore. Again, perception is important here. You can take it negatively and let it stop your progress completely; or you can call it a speed bump and go on. Yes, it will make you slow down, but you're still getting where you want to go. If you take anything from this, let it be this: what's important is not how long it will take, but that you keep moving. 

Remember, speed bumps aren't supposed to stop you; they're only there to slow you down temporarily. Although it might seem like things aren't moving along the way you'd planned, you need to remember that the best things in life rarely do go to plan. And no matter who you are or where you come from, you're going to face these speed bumps along whatever journey you're on. Life is never going to be a perfectly smooth ride, especially when you're working towards your goals - big or small. But if it was too easy, it wouldn't be worth it. Furthermore, you wouldn't learn how to be patient, persistent and strong through the jams and bumps along the way. 

In the end, you need to choose how you look at your situations. Life is only 10% what happens to you. The other 90% is how you choose to deal with / look at it. And although I'm not an expert, my own experience has shown me it's a lot easier to get through the speed bumps with a positive attitude. Don't let the detour make you think you're only going forwards one step to go back another two. Everyone has to face them. Everyone. The ones who succeed are those who make use of the haystack while they're trying to find the needle. It's not the destination, but rather the journey that makes or breaks you.





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